Ryan ‘Gaggsy’ Giggs

Yesterday, in front of the adoring faithful at the theatre of dreams, Ryan Gaggs was presented with his twelfth Premiership Championship medal. A quite remarkable achievement. As the crowd chanted his name, did he pause to wonder about the wisdom of his recent actions? Not just the shagging - but also the gagging? He is reputed to have spent over a quarter of a million on keeping his indiscretions covered up. He would have been better off keeping his hands in his pockets. 

Here in Scotland, the Sunday Herald confirmed what was one of the worst-kept secrets of the internet age. Gaggsy’s move to try to suppress Twitter has backfired spectacularly. It is a monumental own goal. Hundreds of thousands of citizens have tweeted and re-tweeted the details. The facts are in the public domain. 

Pompous old judges getting to grips with the antics of popular beat combos have barely an inkling about the workings of the world wide web. The suppression of Gaggsy’s love life is no big deal. Other cases such as Trafigura, who covered up toxic waste dumping, causing terrible harm and suffering in a third world country, are much more serious. 

The suppression of what the venal, slimy, toe-rag known as Fred the Shred got up to is on yet another level. This so-called ‘master of the universe’ helped ruin a national institution and brought misery to millions. The fact that he was granted a super-injunction says a great deal about m’learned friends and the way the powerful are protected while the weak can sod off. Lawyers who make a very handsome living in these cases resemble the worst plastic surgeons who make fortunes out of the rich and gullible, sculpting vanity projects out of silicone and botox. The outcomes are frequently similar too. Despite denials,  the evidence is there for all to see.

On the same day the Herald put on record the name of one errant footballer, Andrew ‘Gagger‘ Marr interviewed President Obama. Why? The man now has zero credibility as a serious journalist. He is a self-acknowledged hypocrite. Surely there must be other intelligent interviewers within the BBC? Selecting ‘Gagger’ for this job said a great deal about the values at the heart of the Corporation’s news team. It is also an insight into the kind of money ‘Gagger’ is on for him to be able to afford to go down the super-injunction route.  

And therein lies the essence. Super-injunctions are tools for the rich and powerful. They are neither just nor fair.